Technicolor Line: A New Episode

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Target Inspection

Francis Bacon, Advancement of Learning (bk. II) The sun, which passeth through pollutions and itself remains as pure as before.

Exams. Over. Breathe!

We caught Rumor Has It today. The movie talks about relationship and lays emphasis on marriage. At first, I thought it would assist me to get familiar on the bright side of being married and consider seeing myself one day with a man. Unfortunately, it failed. Right now the supremacy of my idea about marriage is so solid. The intensity of my explanation to voice that I don't agree with it is soaring.

After the movie, we parted ways. I stayed to drink a cup of coffee with a good friend; busy with a beneficial chat.

We thought of the senseless and remarkable memories that happened in the past of our lives. I value them no matter what. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am right now. My failures and frustrations are in charge to head me in life. I can't imagine myself anymore escaping from classes and not bothered being suspended for five days. The alarming part for me now is, get to do something that I fear each day, be devoted and willing to take consequences and possibilities.

I do make plans about the future. It feels good at first. But heading on to that direction, I swing my way. I feel like there is an indirect force-often more controlling. I don't want to cling with a weightless aim though. I hate to do something just because I am forced to put everything in there and realize in the end that it doesn't even equate to happiness which I seek to pursue.

We talked about the chaotic process of relationship. There are some circumstances which this world fails to notice that they exist. As for myself, I want a redeeming character. The transmission behind my encounter with dating is not temperate, I tell you. I give breathing space to men. I couldn't imagine myself taking care of a man and yes, you may call me selfish. I reflect and think about a lot of women like me. Who wouldn't love to be longed for or desired? Again, I don't make a sweeping statement. I hate it whenever a member of the opposite sex would control on the purity and vulnerability of young girls. Girls may have fragile hearts but in each of them, there is a powerful love which is not to be betrayed nor smashed even a bit.

It feels good to be around with good men. I am not a man hater. I set extreme dislike doing labels. One chapter in my life locates me in the position to distinguish the path I want and at the same time, could cross. I might need men to rescue me but not now or, never. I acknowledge them. They inspire me to feel good that I am a woman and not just that.

Off the topic: Watch Kontrobersyal tomorrow night on ABS-CBN! My aunt will be featured as she talks about biomedicine. Just see what's there.

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